Resenting the Process

"Doing workouts

Eating (mostly) healthy food

Moving Daily

These things should be enhancing your life, not restricting it, not making you miserable.

It's important to think about now only how you look on the outside but how you feel on the inside."

This is a message I sent to my clients this week. It's important to reflect on why you set out to improve your health and fitness.

These are things we want to do for the rest of our life, there isn't an expiry date on these actions.

If you start resenting the process then it's time to try to understand why, the early days of a health and fitness journey feel exciting and new. Over time if you have done too much exercise or restricted too much you can find yourself feeling like you don't want to carry on.

Maybe you are struggling with having great energy levels, your sleep quality has deteriorated and overall your mood and well being feel like they are being adversely affected it's time to reassess what you are doing.

Finding the right balance with a healthy lifestyle takes time especially if there are a lot of new habits you are trying to build. I don't think our culture lends itself to the hard work and patience required to build long term changes and habits.

What to do if you start resenting the process?

Acknowledge the feeling of resentment, rather than deny or minimise it.

Think about why you are resentful of a process aimed at making your life better in the long term. Review your motives and expectations when you started.

You are in control of this process so acknowledge that and think of ways to re-engage with the process.

Maybe you have been overly restrictive with your diet, or you have tried to workout every day, be honest are these action making you feel happy or do you have a sense of duty to actions that are now not serving you well. If you hear yourself saying you "should" do these things then it's time to reframe them and ensure they are sustainable and enjoyable (you do not have to love the process when you start?) 

Talk to a trusted friend or family member about how you are feeling. Usually we just need a little reassurance that we are doing the right things, accept it's going to be difficult some times and to keep going.

There is something magical about talking out loud (even to yourself) research has shown that talking out loud can motivate you to move forward with your goals, help you to focus and combat self-criticism.

Try it in a safe place where only you can hear. I've done this in my car or when I'm on my own at home. Trust me, it's a great way to process how you feel.

"Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies" - Nelson Mandela.